Tuesday, March 18, 2014


"What do you want on your tombstone, Alice?" the Mad Hatter asked.  It was completely random, but Hatter was off his medications that day.  We were all used to it after all this time.  The tea parties still went on as scheduled, no matter what.  One had even been held the day of the bloody coup, when the Red Queen had been overthrown.

Alice pushed the oversized top hat back on Hatter's head so she could see his face.  His enormous blue eyes gazed back, and we all leaned forward a bit. Alice was like the sun, and those of us in Wonderland were drawn to her warmth. It was sometimes easy to forget that the sun can burn.

"I haven't given the matter that much thought," Alice began, curling a blonde strand around her finger.  "It's a weighty matter, a tombstone. I would say that the inscription should be a reflection of the personality of the deceased person, but I know that all of you will disagree."

"Of course we'll disagree!" The Queen of Hearts shoved her way among the rest of us, sloshing the red wine in her glass all over the White Rabbit.  "Off with 'er head!"

"No, my dear Queen, you mustn't off with anyone's heads these days," The White Rabbit delicately dabbed at his now stained fur.  Rabbit was so much more laid back since he started smoking the same stuff as the Caterpillar.  "Remember our last group therapy session?" 

The Queen had the grace to look a bit confused, and allowed a Knave to take her arm and lead her away.  All the remaining heads, still attached, turned back to Alice. 

"I suppose that I would like something along the lines of "I had a lover's quarrel with the world","  Alice's eyes became faraway, and we all fervently wished that we could join her. 

"But Alice," Hatter spluttered. "Some guy named Frost already took that one!"

Collectively, we held our breath. The Cheshire Cat completely disappeared. Alice frowned a moment, thinking as hard as she could. When she smiled, we all exhaled with relief.

"Why then, I guess that my tombstone should say, 'She had a lover's quarrel with Wonderland.'" Satisfied with herself, Alice poured another round of scotch, then passed the bottle.  She raised her glass.

"To friends!"  We all raised our glasses and then drank.  Alice slammed her glass to the table, laughed, and pointed at poor Hatter.

"Off with 'is head!" She shouted with glee. Struck mute with our fear, we watched them drag poor Hatter, now hatless, to the block.

I would have written of me on my stone: I had a lover’s quarrel with the world.
~Robert Frost


  1. I love the thought of them all in group therapy together! Oh you! You went to the dark side in the end! ;)

  2. This is a scary, scary, scary story! Thank you! LM x

  3. How wickedly delightful. You had me at 'Mad Hatter,' and then I didn't want to let go. Nice response to the prompt.

  4. Phenomenal. Truly. I read it about 7 times (I did!) and every time I found another word or sentence that I almost wanted to write down and "borrow".
    I always enjoy your writing but this was just ...great.

    plus I loved the slant on Wonderland.

  5. Brilliant, brilliant, brilliant. I love your updated Wonderland.

  6. Whoops, poor Hatter. Alice should really be careful, someday the rest of Wonderland might as well rise up against her! Executing the Hatter after all is tyranny, haha :D

  7. This was a great ride through a well thumbed fairy story-only on the other side!Here I was happy that the Red Queen had been overthrown and that Hatter was off his meds ,when there is a talk of death and the Red queen walks in-what a sock but then you squish that fear when she is led away and we learn about group therapy.Should have caught you at ,"Collectively, we held our breath. The Cheshire Cat completely disappeared. Alice frowned a moment, thinking as hard as she could. When she smiled, we all exhaled with relief",but alas I was totally taken in and then wham,you punched us with that last line!Am doing a happy dance now TMW and am sure you are going to take the crown with this :D


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