Friday, May 18, 2012

WOE: Choices

Prompt: In 400 words or less, write a story or memoir which relates to choices and/or consequences.  Let me know what you think; this was all I had brainwise!

It all comes down to choice, Melanie thought. My choice.  

The two men sat nervously, side by side, on her small couch, their hands and feet revealing their agitation. Jordan's fingers twisted over each other in a continuous wringing of his anxious state. Leland's hands were still, but his left foot was bouncing an invisible soccer ball.

Melanie looked at them both carefully as she had been instructed. Jordan's eyes were the gray of an ice storm, which didn't seem to match his blonde hair or his tan skin. Leland's posture was confident, his eyes were kind, but he appeared to have had some scarring on one side of his face.   She knew the genetics of each man; they were healthy and disease free.  She knew that some of the lines on Leland's face were from laughter, while the lines between Jordan's eyes were from pain. 

Her father had handpicked these men for her.  They were known for their abilities in protection and defense skills.  They had jobs that earned good money, and both of them could support a wife and a child. All she had to do was make a choice.  Melanie chewed her lower lip thoughtfully.

"Just to be clear, both of you want to marry me?"

"Yes," the men responded together.

"And both of you want to have a child with me?" Melanie found this the hardest part to accept. She was a very plain woman, after all.  It seemed impossible that any man would want her, let alone two.  But the two in front of her murmured assent. 

Melanie looked at the two men.  As only one of the 1000 women left on the continent, her services as a baby house were constantly in demand.  And yet she was tired of being a mere receptacle used to grow a baby.  She wanted a child of her own.  She wanted a relationship.

"Okay, gentlemen." Melanie beamed at them.  "I have made my choice."  They leaned forward, eager.

"I choose both of you for my husband,"  She announced.

"But, you're only supposed to choose one!"  Jordan was aghast. Leland just sat silent, waiting.

"Then I'll be the first to have two!" Melanie clapped her hands in her excitement.  "We will start a trend!"

There was a thud in the next room as her father had fainted. 


  1. I love you.

    ok, now that that is over. Here is what I did like, the premise, the IN YOUR FACE and middle finger to the way things are done. I loved the desciptions of the men and the obvious agitation.

    Here is what I would like...rewrite it, not as like a science fictiony type thing but as something that COULD happen to the dull daughter of a powerful wealthy man. Make it hot and steamy with us knowing that one man might just love her, but the other is in it for the gain and power,...I'll write it with you.

    I don't do science fiction. LOL but I do do HOT(not well, but I do) and I'd love to see this as something that could actually happen when in the end Melanie is the SMARTEST BITCH of all.

    but honestly, your way, was brilliant, it always is. You had me at the first line and when her dad fainted I laughed out loud.

    SO GOOD. (I kinda hate you a little when you write this way. Just a LITTLE)

  2. "We'll start a trend!" LOVE THIS LINE!

    This is obviously a world were the woman could make the decisions, yes! With only a thousand left, I'd say we could finally take over and rule the world!!

    I hope you had as much fun writing it as I did to read it! Bravo!

  3. I love how you took something so ordinary and mundane and added a great twist to it. I mean - come on - who doesn't want a loving relationship for themselves at some point. I think the sci-fi twist to it with how you ended it was a perfect touch.

  4. This was delightful. So much fun. At first I thought maybe she was a contestant on a game show (like the dating game or something) and she had to choose a date. And then as it goes further you're like "No way!"

    I dig the sci-fi aspect. And I love the child-like joy when she announces she chooses both, that they can start a trend. Makes sense really, since there are so few women :)

  5. This is a light and fun response to the prompt, especially with the heavy undertones of being one of only 1000 uteruses (uterii?) left on the continent.

    I like the two different reactions from the future husbands :)

  6. What a great response to the prompt! I love it! Fun, unexpected, and well-written. Fabulous!
    -JD from


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