Wednesday, March 3, 2010

I Did Something Nice

I don't always think about doing thoughtful things for other people.  I tend to be oblivious to what other people need, especially if I'm focused on my own problems.  But every now and then I manage to make a conscious decision to do something nice for someone.  It could be a small gift or something bigger or something else entirely, depending on what that person might need.  My 'nice' might consist of just sitting and listening to someone vent for a few minutes.  It costs me nothing and it makes the other person feel good for a little while, so it's all good. 

Today I surprised my husband with a trip to a local spa, the Retreat, for a massage.  He'd been complaining about his back hurting for some time, and today was the big writing test that he had been working with the kids on for the past month.  So his treat was to get a massage. While I waited for him I got a pedicure, since I couldn't just sit out there in the waiting room for an hour.  Larry said it was the 'bestest' massage he'd ever had, and he was very happy about it.  And I was happy that he was happy. 

I think that marriage should be about doing things that show consideration for each other. Notice that I didn't say a word about talking. Talking doesn't count. Actions speak louder than words. You can tell someone "I love you", but if you don't behave as if you do, then that's the message the other person hears.   I'm not talking about grand gestures, any idiot can do those.  Think smaller, more intimate!   Let your spouse sleep in every now and then, or write them a short note or text saying something complementary.  Make them a cup of coffee in the morning and bringing it to them while they are getting ready.  Buy them a copy of their favorite magazine without them asking for it. Massage their feet while the two of you are watching TV.  Let your spouse pick a movie every once in a while and don't complain about their choice.  There are so many things we can do to show how we feel about each other that don't cost money and give us so much in return.  Choose one.

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