Spring Has Sprung a Leak

I wish that I could say that I've been romping about in the meadows, full of glee.  I wish that I could say that I have spent hours flitting from flower to flower, inhaling the wonderful aroma of spring.

That would be a lie. 

While I love the spring, with the warmer weather easing the pains in my joints, the spring does not love me back.  Random pollen, from plants that NOBODY else is allergic to, cause me to sneeze uncontrollably and leak various colorful fluids from my nose and eyes.  This certainly makes the many meetings I attend more interesting.  I used to try and pass off my tears and runny nose as something else, but now I just grab my inhaler and look pitiful.  

I could wear a mask, like I did when I was going through chemo.  I could just stay indoors for three or four months. Or I could move to Canada, where I can't possibly be allergic to anything. Except perhaps bears.   

The pollen here may cause me consternation. Oh  yes.  However, I love the colors of the wildflowers strewn all willy-nilly on every patch of grass larger than a postage stamp.  I love the glory of the mountain laurel trees, with their purple, grape-smelling flowers. It's an awesome display, every color represented, and I find myself inspired in spite of the need for tissues.  All too soon, the flowers, and the color, are gone, until next year. 

Kind of a silly metaphor for how fast life passes us by.  I had better enjoy it while I can!

Life At Our House

So my family roots are German, and I've lived in Germany. When I was 8, my dad was transferred to Germany, and we were there for three and a half years. I went to the DOD schools.  I spoke nothing but English the entire time.  My only actual experience with speaking German came my senior year of high school.  If asked, I can recite a line about reading two pages for Biology, but that's about it.  

In my husband's mind, such information as where I lived as a child translates a bit differently.  To him, I must know everything about Deutschland by virtue of my ancestry and childhood. I must know German. I must know all the cities and towns. I certainly must know all of the soccer teams. 

"What does this word mean?" Larry asked one day. "Bundes______Bayern?"

"I don't know,"  I replied. "It sounds like a town in Bavaria."

Not to be dissuaded by a little thing like an 'I don't know',  Larry began to spell the word.

"L-I-B..."

I glared at him.

"If I didn't know it when you said it, why would you think that I would know it when you spelled it?"

"Uhhh..."  

I guess that I should be flattered that he thinks I'm so smart, huh?

It Makes Me Nervous

optional prompt: it makes me nervous

 

This prompt made me laugh a little in my head.  Because just about everything on the planet out there,  it makes me nervous.   It's just the way I am.  My entire existence sometimes seems to be a huge bundle of anxiety.

 

Waking up in the morning?   Makes me nervous.   What kind of day will it be?  Who will I see that I'd rather not see? Who won't I see that I would like to see?  

 

Getting dressed? Makes me nervous.  Does this color go with plaid?  Why doesn't this fit me today?  Are those heels too tall and am I going to fall on my face while walking? 

Dropping my child off at school?  Makes me nervous.  Do these teachers think I am horrible because I send my child to school with stuff that I know he will eat instead of stuff that is good for him?  How much am I screwing up his psyche today? 

At work?  Makes me nervous.  What major, important, legally binding commitment did I forget?  Which part of the system will break down today?  Who expects me to make decisions for them?

 

It goes on, day in and day out, this running commentary about all the things that I could be found lacking, my shortcomings, what might happen, and quite often, things that I have absolutely no control over.  It is actually rather ridiculous.  So I've learned to ignore most of the things that make me nervous.  I have forced that little voice into a dark corner in the back of my head, and even if it does make me nervous, I do it anyway.  

Except for cockroaches.  I make my husband take care of those. 

 

 

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Red Writing Hood: Flash Fiction: Harsh life

Note: This is my first attempt at Flash Fiction, which is, as I understand it, supposed to be 55 words or less. I didn't make it. I'm loquacious.

Life is shared laughter, as we return from a night out.
Nature calls.
The air is suddenly full of shrill screams.
Scorpion in the toilet!
My rescuer approaches...
He flushes the toilet, gives a condescending look.
"Don't look at me like that!" I defensively mutter.
I storm into the bedroom, again locking him out for the night.
The scorpion isn't the only thing that stings in this house.

Soapbox: Talk to Your Kids About Transition

The other night I was watching my son sleeping. His eyelids were fluttering a bit, and I thought that he was probably dreaming. He looked so peaceful, like all sleeping children do. There's nothing more relaxing than watching a healthy, sleeping child. Yep.

That's when the thought came to me: Zane will be driving in thirteen more years. Holy Crap! And then I wasn't so relaxed anymore. But it does illustrate that parents need to think about the future for their kids NOW.

What I am referring to is more than the standard, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" talk. There's so more to this than that. We all want our children to have dreams, and most of us want those dreams to have some fulfillment. But those dreams need to have a foundation of realism to them.

For example, let's go back to the "What do you want to be when you grow up?" question. I have lost count of the number of teenagers who tell me that they are going to play for the NBA/NFL/ETC. Parents need to steer their kids toward more realistic expectations for their career choices. Teach your kids to give themselves options. A Plan B, or Plan C, etc. And this is just the tip of the iceberg.

Does your child want to go to college? How do they intend to pay for it? Do they have the grades to earn the scholarships? There was never a time in my life that I did not intend to go to college. It was just assumed that I would. But my parents didn't talk to me about paying for school until they told me that they were going to pay for it. Up until that point, I just figured I was going to get by on my good looks. (I was kind of cute back then--and naive!)

Does your child understand the concept of budgeting? Do they understand that the paychecks that come into the house pay for 'invisible' things such as electricity, internet access, or garbage pickup? Do you talk about mortgage payments? Right now, we tell Zane that we have to work to pay for his "presents" at Christmas. When he's older, we will discuss how the money comes in and where the money goes, so he has a realistic concept of what he will need to live as an adult.

Does your child want to drive a car? How are they going to pay for a car, if you don't have one to give them? Who will pay for the insurance? Who will pay for the gas? Are you freaking out yet? Take a deep breath.

I work with special needs children. Some of these kids are going to need a lot of help to be successful. That need for help isn't going to cease once they hit 18. Is this child going to be able to make decisions for themselves once they hit 18 and are considered an adult? Is this child going to live in a group home? Is this child going to be able to get a job? Is this child going to be able to drive? If not, how is this child going to get from their house to their job? Is this child able to take care of their medical needs? What is going to happen to this child if their parents or siblings are not around anymore?

These are scary questions for some people to think about, but they NEED to be thought about, and talked about, throughout your child's life. In the world of Special Education, this is called Transition Planning, but this stuff should be for all kids. The great people over at Autism Speaks have created a tool kit about transition. It is excellent, and even if you don't have a child with autism, you should check it out.

I'll get off the soapbox for now. I hope I've got you thinking!