Need Some Ideas For Mother's Day?

Mother's day is May 11th, and mothers everywhere will be expecting, well...something.  Some sign that they are appreciated, loved, adored, etc.  What mothers expect varies, from being allowed to sleep late to a day where the toilet seat is left down more than up.  Mothers aren't usually picky--as long as a gift is from the heart, we are going to love it.

But perhaps you've purchased flowers for the last few years, and you'd like to do something different.  Maybe you've done the 'breakfast in bed' routine too many times, and you're looking for a new and improved Mother's Day present.  I am here to help.  I cannot possibly be the only mom who wants these particular items.  They'd be welcome on any day, actually. 

1. A clean house.   Moms are perpetually cleaning the house, and I'm sorry to say that it gets irritating fast.  Nothing is more annoying for me than finishing the last load of laundry...and finding dirty socks on the floor under a chair.  Or filling up the dishwasher, starting it up...and locating a coffee cup upstairs.  Nothing is ever finished in the housework war.  We moms would love to have our house clean, with no hidden dirty items, for at least a day or two. 

2.  Alone time.  Moms never get a moment's peace.  Most days, we can't even go to the bathroom without being interrupted by a child pounding on the door.  While we love our children dearly, we moms need some alone time, a couple of hours to read, or watch our favorite movie, or even just to take a nap.

3.  A spa weekend.  Spa weekends are all about pampering.  Massages, facials, thick soft robes, quiet...what's not to love?  Spas tend to be in out of the way places, like the mountains, where the air is clear and crisp and not filled with the smell of boy sweat and stale Cheerios.  Spas are for resting and regenerating, before returning to those daily battles with the world.  We need that sometimes.  

4. A mani/pedi.  If a spa weekend is out of the realm of financial possibility, I understand completely.  We are all living paycheck to paycheck these days, unless we are in the 1%, and that means things like food are a priority, and trips to fancy spas are out.  Still, moms need a little pampering now and then, and a mani/pedi is just the ticket.  Most of us will settle for a foot massage.

5. Homecooking.  Moms occasionally want some time off from cooking, just like anyone else.  Having someone else put dinner on the table would be a pleasant surprise.  Spaghetti is a relatively easy meal that kids can whip up with some adult supervision, for instance.  Greet mom at the door with a glass of her favorite red wine, and let her put her feet up until supper is ready.


So.  I have just given you five ideas for a Mother's Day treat that will be very appreciated, and not all of them cost an arm and a leg.  Pick two or three, and your mom will be happy.  When Mom is happy, the entire family is happy, is what I always say. 

Any other ideas to add?

The Presence of Presents

My husband often accuses me of waiting until the last minute to buy gifts for people. When he does that, I usually end up walking off in a huff; I think that I do good huff. Secretly, I have to consider that Larry might be right, but it's not laziness that keeps me from braving stores early.

It's the idea that a gift must be perfect that gets me. It stops me in my tracks and paralyzes me with indecisiveness. I hate that.

I try to be a thoughtful giver. I try to find gifts that show that I have paid attention to hobbies or favorite activities. These days, however, it feels like the gifts that I choose must be THE absolutely most perfect-for-that-person ever. If I am buying a gift for a music lover, for example, then I have to find an obscure recording of Blind Lemon Jefferson(Bonus points if you know who that is without Google!). If I'm buying for a knitter, then it has to be virgin-worsted grass-fed Himalayan Alpaca wool. I don't even know what that is, but I feel pressured to find it. The thought of a disappointed face spurs me on.

In years past, I would drive myself crazy trying to find the "right" present. I still do for some people. If it isn't the "right" present, then it doesn't count, for some people. I wasn't aware that there was a contest, but I have been competing anyway. If I didn't get the "right" present, then I had failed. It hasn't help that occasionally, after all my efforts, the recipient of my gift would show their appreciation by immediately returning my "perfect" present, or by telling me that they were disappointed. And yes, those things have actually happened. Those people get gift cards or cash, and then marked off my list. I don't even bother now. It makes me sad, but I have enough to worry about without adding their disappointment to my plate.

A gift should never be given with the expectation of gratitude. It truly should be the 'thought' that counts, as cliche' as that sounds. It's not about the dollar amount, either. For a gift to have presence, for a gift to be "right", it only needs the giver's desire to bring joy to the recipient behind it. If my son, in his desire to make me smile on Christmas morning, makes me some sort of lumpish knick-knack, then that gift is perfect. When people open gifts that express that sense of thoughtfulness in some way, it lights up their heart, even if the gift isn't what they expected. The gift of love always shines. That is what people remember about the gifts they are given; those are the memories that people hold close to their hearts.