Sunday, December 9, 2018

Adulting 101: Making Mistakes

There isn't an organism out there that hasn't made an oopsie. A boo boo. An error. A faux pas. Everybody makes mistakes.  It's life.  You pick yourself up and hope that you didn't break anything.  Kids are expected to make mistakes. They fall down, bump their glass of milk over, or write their name for the first time on the wall in the hallway.  Parents expect their kids to make mistakes, and if they don't, they have no business being parents. 

I was paranoid when my son started walking, because his head size was at the 99th percentile.  He was top heavy, at least until the rest of his body caught up.  I expected him to fall, and I tried to be there to catch him, or just to give him an ice pack and hold him while he cried.  Most of us would do anything to prevent our children from being hurt, but they eventually hit their head, or skin their knee. Or break one of their mother's special crystal glasses that are only for GUESTS.  Or leave their mother's favorite stuffed animal, the one that she's had since she was 8 years old, on the floor for the dog to chew the eyes out. *sigh* 

Mistakes are expected of children. We know they will make mistakes,  and we are there to help them get over it. Mistakes are one of the ways kids learn. It's okay for them. We encourage them to try things, to fall down, and get back up.

Adults, not so much.  Why is that?  We don't all of a sudden become perfect when we hit eighteen, yet we expect ourselves to be.  Who told us that?

That's a baldfaced lie. 

Nobody is perfect.   Even God created mosquitoes. 

Did you make a mistake?  Here's three things to do to make things better.

1. Own it.  There's nothing more frustrating than someone who will not take responsibility for their actions. Some people will stare at a video of themselves committing an act, and will still flat out deny they did it. Why? If you did it, admit it.  Yep, that was me who accidentally set your faux fur coat on fire. Heh. Who knew synthetic fur was so flammable? 

2. Fix it.  Would it kill you to apologize?  Would your brain explode as the words left your mouth?  Would it be the end of the world?  No.  No. And also, NO.  Those idiots who insist that one should never apologize are wrong. Apologize, make amends, buy them a new faux fur. At least make an effort to repair whatever damage you've caused.

3. Forgive it.  This is the most difficult part. Say that you screwed up, mea culpa, etc. Then move on. Forgive yourself.  Don't dwell on some mistake you made in high school, when you accidentally called the handsomest boy in school the wrong name at an assembly. Why carry all that extra baggage around? Yet many of us remember these relatively minor events as if they're fresh, as if the mountain of mistakes should bury us. We deserve it. Self flagellation is not a good look on anyone. Let it go, as the song says. It will take effort, but will be worth it.

Now go adult. 

1 comment:

  1. When you make a mistake, keep in mind that it doesn’t define who you are as a person. Try not to jump to conclusions about your worth or value. No one’s perfect, and that’s okay.

    ReplyDelete

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