Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Backseat Drivers

We used to tell Zane the colors of the traffic lights before he started talking; it was a way to pass the time and help him learn his colors.  We were stupid back then.  Somewhere along the way, my son started watching our driving very carefully.  I am not sure when it happened, but Zane began channeling the evil driving instructor from my high school days.  He even has that old school driving instructor tone of voice, that "I am so bored with you morons" tone.  It drives me up the wall, although I do my best not to show it.  At least he's looking around at the world, right?

"Green means go."

"Yes, son."

"Red means stop."

"Yes, son."

Yellow means slow down."

"Yes, son."

"Green arrow!"

"Yes, son."

"Car's coming!"

"Yes, son."

"Stop Sign!  Mama, why are you hitting your head on the steering wheel?"

Fortunately, my son cannot see the speedometer.  He'd be telling me to slow down, too. Come to think of it, that would have been a good idea.  It might have kept me from getting my second speeding ticket in the past year.  Before last year I hadn't had a speeding ticket for almost twenty years, but suddenly I have a lead foot, and was going 8 miles over the speed limit.

I wasn't trying to speed, but I also wasn't paying attention to my speed, either.  My son didn't say a word while I was talking to the police officer and giving him my license, etc. Once he went to his car to write out the ticket, I had to explain why we had been pulled over.  It's a little embarrassing to have a cop behind you, lights flashing, when you have your kid in the car.

It's even worse when your husband is sitting in the passenger seat. He's not ever going to let me live it down!

6 comments:

  1. Hahaha! Sorry ... not sure if I'm meant to laugh at your misfortune or not. You just MIGHT get away with this in later years by defining it as a lesson in reverse-socially-acceptable-behaviour-and-embarrassment-attraction so that Z will NEVER NEVER get a speeding ticket! You're welcome ...

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  2. My husband is the only one who's been pulled over when the kids are in the car... now that's all they talk about when they see a police car! "Is he going to make daddy stop and tell him to slow down? Daddy shouldn't drive so fast."

    Hehe.

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  3. It's probably best he didn't see the speedometer. When I got a ticket the officer asked how fast I was going and I tried to play stupid. Out of the back seat came this loud voice, "She was going 63 MPH. That's 8 miles over the speed limit!"

    Yeah, I got a ticket and Alex let the free world know about it. Ever since, his car seat's been on the driver's side so he CAN'T see the speedometer.....

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  4. oh no sorry about that---i was pulled over a couple of years ago--because i was not aware of the rather new law that says you cannot pass a police car who is stopped on the side of the road--you have to change to the left lane if possible which i couldn't even if i had known the law--anyway he let me go with a warning--daughter in the back seat!

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  5. I knew where this was going. I've also been stopped with kids in the car. It made my son cry hysterically from fear. The cop let me off because of it, I'm sure. I wish I could have had him around to cry on cue at other moments. They watch the speedometer like hawks when they can see over your shoulder. Funny story!

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  6. Those boys are going to have a driving instructor's brake installed!

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