Silence is Definitely Golden

We were at the drive-thru at Wendy's the other day after picking Zane up from daycare. I am extremely tired. I am at the part where you roll down your window and tell a disembodied voice what you want. Zane is trying to say something while I am talking, and per his usual routine, if you don't hear him or acknowledge him in some way, he gets louder. My husband is trying to tell Zane to be quiet for a second.

Me: "I'd like a kid's meal with..."

Zane: "Mama!(decibels increase to yelling across the room level) MAMA!(decibels increase to loud car stereo level)"

Mr. Reasonable: "Zane, you need to be quiet so..."

Me:"...mandarin oranges...Zane, I need you to be quiet for a minute..."

Zane: "MAMA!(decibels increase to elephant stampede level)"

Mr. Reasonable:"...your mom can place our food order..."

Me: "...and milk..."

Zane: "MAMA!!!!(decibels increase to an NBA playoff game where the home team is winning by 2 and there's four seconds on the clock and the ref just called a foul)"

Mr. Reasonable: "...so you can get your prize..."

I don't do well with loud noises. I don't do well when more than one person is trying to talk to me. I just could not think with all that racket. I snapped. I did not care that I was a couple of feet from a speaker that broadcast my voice to the entire restaurant.

"KNOCK IT OFF!!!!"

MY decibel range was somewhere in the range of a thrash metal concert in front of THREE 767 jet engines and a rocket ship blasting off. (at least those voice lessons from college were good for something!)

Silence from the back seat. Silence from the front seat. Silence from the Wendy's. Silence from the three cars behind us--one guy even turned his radio off. I turned in my seat, and for good measure, used the patent-pending Mom Glare to emphasize my need for complete silence from the other occupants in the car. I took a deep breath.

I turned and apologized to the poor girl working the drive-thru for ruining her hearing, completed our order, then pulled up to the window to pay. It was the fastest drive-thru service we have ever had. As we were driving home, Zane finally recovered from his shock.

"Mama, I am NOT happy with you!" He said. I laughed an evil laugh that wasn't the least bit hysterical. Not at all.

Drive-thru Communication

When someone tells you to pull up to the bush and they will have 'it' right out to you, well...you really can't blame a person for at least a brief misinterpretation.