Monday, August 27, 2012

The A-List: Get to know YOU Questions

I've seen a lot of posts out there with "Get to Know Me" kinds of questions, or "30 Days of Truth" stuff that's supposed to be deep and meaningful.  That's well and good if you like that sort of thing, never mind that nobody is checking the answers for minimal truthiness.   However, I have other questions that I would want answered should we meet. Important questions that truly reveal who you are as a person at a level deeper than deep.  Friendship-level deep, with all the gossip and drinking and fun that entails. 

These are some of the things that I want to know, if I were interviewing for friends.  There aren't really any right or wrong answers, but the answers reveal a great deal. At least I think so.  I haven't done any sort of scientific study or anything, because those aren't really any fun at all.  (Really.  They teach you about this in grad school.) These are questions that I've inconspicuously asked over the years.  In some cases, I've savored the answers like a fine wine; in others, I've had to spit out the vinegar. 

1. We are eating lunch in a restaurant. George Clooney walks by.  Since I am an enormous fangirl, I get up to get his autograph. Do you tell me that I have spinach in my teeth or let me go?   I seem to eat items that stick in the crevices of my teeth.  I will have entire conversations with people with a green smile, with stalks of broccoli protruding from my mouth...and nobody says a word.  That means that either the people I eat with are secretly laughing at me or that they didn't notice. Either way is a bit sad, but I'll live.  I promise you, here and now, that if we meet and I notice that you have something in your teeth, I will let you know, just in case George Clooney walks by. 

2. We are at a concert, when a man approaches us to ask if we would like to come backstage to meet the band.  Do you say yes?  Why or why not?  This question came into existence because it actually happened to me.  It was the Metallica concert in Ft. Worth, and we had just wandered into the building and were looking for our seats. I still get annoyed about the whole thing.

3. Picture in your mind your favorite celebrity(if you are picturing Justin Bieber, you are TOO young to be reading this blog!).  He is standing in line in front of us at the movie theater.  I deliberately push you, and you end up in his arms, your darkest fantasy.  What happens next?
Here I am, helping you out, being a good friend and putting you in a position to at least speak to your celebrity crush.  Because if you want it, I want to help you get it!  I'm a giver, and I mean that in a not-weird way.

4. You don't want kids, because they are messy and you prefer a clean house with no smeary fingerprints.  However, I do have children, and I like to talk about them on occasion.  How many cute child stories are acceptable during a five minute conversation?   When I did not have a child, hearing someone talk about their children for hours was actually physically painful.  I understand that people who don't have children might not want to hear all about my son, however adorable he might be.  I try to be considerate, and limit my stories.  I also understand that if I talk about Zane, then I must reciprocate and listen to the other person discuss their children.  I will even listen to stories about pets without uttering a word of complaint.  Knowing how many stories are to be allotted in a specified time frame will be very helpful. 

5.  We end up arrested and in the pokey for participating in some shenanigans.  When they bring you into the interrogation room and start asking questions, do you spill your guts or clam up?  If you hang out with me, sometimes things will happen.  Hilarious hijinks may be happening, the sort that we will tell around the dinner table at Thanksgiving. But other incidents may take place over the course of our friendship, such as mullets or horrible tattoos, that we do not want getting out. Things that never need to see the light of day, such as that time in Vegas.  Especially that time in Vegas. I need to know that you've got my back, that you won't be singing like a canary about my tendency to steal pens in the first grade.

So? Are there any questions that you would ask on a friendship quiz?  Do tell in the comments!


  1. 1. I would totally tell you about something stuck in your I'm flagging him down so you don't miss him.
    2. I would have to see if the guy looked like he would rape us or not...
    3. I would probably crap my pants because I've not shaved or showered in a few days....
    4. I do have kids and am still as anal so this question doesn't count. In the old days pre kids, you'd have like 2 stories...
    5. Turn into a clam.

    1. See, I knew we were meant to be in the same cell block!

  2. Okay, this is one of the greatest meme-ish posts I ever read, because commenting on it seems like so much fun.

    1. I would tell you if I notice. But I admit there's a big chance I won't notice. Like I probably won't notice a new haircut or new glasses until they aren't new anymore.
    2. Depends on the guy, but depends even more on the band. I think I would be a bit afraid the magic of the concert would be broken.
    3. I would love you and hate you for it. I would become all red and shy and still hoping he would find me nice and attractive. Because that's how dark fantasies work.
    4. Not having kids yet, and I'm still very understanding. If you succeed to extend those 5 minutes to 40, I might get itchy though. Even though I'm pregnant right now, I can barely stand being questioned about it all the time. Like I've turned into a huge belly, and just an extra item others can mother.
    5. I had to look up 'shenanigans' :). I might disappoint you here, it would be not really probable to get in such situations. I'm the one who spoils the party when things are not really acceptable in my eyes. I can be a clam, but I don't like to lie. Especially if I'm not OK with what I'm lying about. But I will have warned you first :)

    (And please do correct my grammar/spelling, as English is not my mother tongue)


I welcome comments, but reserve the right to correct your spelling because I am OCD about it!