Prompt: This week, we’d like you to take an honest look in your toolbox and pull out one of the tools you believe needs a little polishing. You could practice dialogue or character development, narrative description or setting, plot advancement or denouement. I think that I have a weakness in narrative description; I was trying to be more sensory here. I tend to want to get right to the meat, and skip the set up. I'm also going to step out of first person, just because that is my comfort zone. Eeek!
As always, concrit is extremely appreciated!
Zenna woke up slowly, feeling the unfamiliar warmth
surrounding her and snuggling into it until her back became painfully
aware of the hardness of the floor beneath her. Her abdomen fluttered
in protest, the baby inside of her demanding movement. Absently, her
palm rubbed small circles on her already protruding belly in a calming
gesture. She took a deep breath, and the rich aroma of cinnamon,
vanilla, sandalwood, and something unfamiliar filled her lungs. Zenna
And as her eyes opened, they were pulled upward to what should
have been the darkness of the ceiling. Yet light was reflected off of
even the tiniest speck of gypsum or quartz above her. Zenna was stunned
by the intense beauty. It was as if the entire roof of the cavern had
been removed and all the stars in the sky were streaming their light at
It was also overwhelming; she closed her eyes again
quickly and turned her head away. She may not know where she was, but
she was very certain that she did not want to vomit.
Eyes still closed, Zenna sat up, gingerly, stretching to
ease the dull pain in her back. She crossed her legs in front of her. A
light breeze whispered over her skin and ruffled her hair. She smiled;
it had almost sounded as though a large pair of wings had just stirred
the air into movement.
"Welcome to my home, Zenna Boones-mate," a rich voice resonated in the cavern. "And welcome to your children, as well."